Last night, under the influence of god knows what impulse, I finally ventured onto the 79 versions of Popcorn page at WFWU.org. I have been avoiding visiting this page for ages because I know I have no willpower and I would end up doing exactly what I did do, which was listen to most of them in one sitting.
I listened to sixty versions of one of the most annoyingly brilliant three minutes of instrumental pop music ever. In one go. Over three hours. Everything from a capella versions, to home made midi files, to The Boston Pops orchestra and James Last to heavy, thudding Techno remixes. I have no idea why I did this to myself except, as I said, I have no will power. All day today, anything and everything anyone has said to me has been filtered through a background soundtrack of be bo be bo biddy boop. Be bo be bo biddy boop. Be bo be bo de bo debo debo de bo biddy bop...
Tonight, in a desperate attempt to Be bo get this be bo insidious musical mega-meme out of my bo biddy bloody boop head, I tried to think of a tune even more annoyingly infectious with which to exorcize it.
Cue the muppets:
Mahna Mahna - do do de doo doot - Mahna Mahna - do do di doot!
After only a few minutes Googling, looking for other versions, I discover that Mahna Mahna was originaly written by an Italian composer called Piero Umiliani - for the soundtrack of a 1970s Swedish porn movie??? Dear god, NO! The images that that conjured up were just so disturbingly weird. The thought of vast numbers of hearty, Swedish hippies bonking along to 'Mahna Mahna - do do de doo doot!' in glorious hand-held 16mm pornovision was just too much.Mahna Mahna - do do de doo doot - Mahna Mahna - do do di doot!
Be careful what you wish for...
I seriously have no space left in my head to think. It's all full of Popcorn and Mahna Mahna getting mashed up together: bo be bo biddy boop, Mahna Mahna, bo be bo biddy boop...
In 1951 Alfred Bester wrote a classic SF novel called The Demolished Man in which he conjectured a police force with detectives able to read the minds of suspects. The villain of the piece wants to commit a murder but knows that the first copper who came by would be able to pick all the details of the crime right out of his head. To avoid this happening he deliberately gets the world's most annoying jingle, stuck in his mind. 'Tenser', said the Tensor; 'tension, apprehension, and dissension have begun'. His plan is to mask his thoughts from the prying telepaths by having this annoyingly insistent crap in his head drowning out all other thoughts . Right now I know what he felt like.
Be bo be bo biddy boop.
-Mahna Mahna
Be bo be bo biddy boop.
-do do de doo doot
Be bo be bo de bo debo debo de bo biddy bop...
-Mahna Mahna
Only now that I just went and thought of 'Tenser', said the Tensor... I now got that stuck in there as well -
Right that's it. I'm off to bed with a pile of arch-minimalist Steve Reich's CDs (stuff like this) and see if I can wipe my mind's music buffers clean- before I go totally do-lally.
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